The Low Moment
by PirateOwl
Summary: Henry's thoughts in the aftermath of Killian's death. Angst with a hopeful ending. An old story that I had somehow not posted here yet.
"You're just scared. This happens to all heroes. It's just the low moment before you fight back." - Henry Mills

* * *

This is not how the story is supposed to end. That is Henry's first thought when his mother runs Killian through with Excalibur. They are both heroes again, now more than ever. They are supposed to get a happy ending now. At first, he thought True Love's Kiss might save the day. It wasn't exactly a curse but still.

It doesn't work and they both sink to the ground. Emma is sobbing and Henry is just numb. This isn't how it is supposed to go. He knows stories and this is all wrong, everything about it is wrong. Maybe it's not a story at all, and that thought hurts more than he would have expected.

Regina releases his shoulders and calls 911. Emma stays on the ground, collapsed on top of Killian, her parents kneeling beside her. He wants to go over to them, he want to say something that will make it better, he wants to believe there is something that would make it better, but he doesn't. He stands frozen beside Robin, running through the last few months in his mind, trying to figure out where everything went wrong. And that is worse because there is no one moment where things fell apart, nothing that makes Killian deserve this, nothing that explains his mother kneeling over Killian's lifeless body screaming his name.

They take Killian away and his grandparents lead Emma back to the empty house that was supposed to be home. The rest of them follow, just standing around. Henry hugs Emma but doesn't say anything. For the first time, he has no idea what to say to her.

Eventually he lets Regina lead him away and back to her house, not because Emma needs the space, but because he does. He has to figure out some way to make sense of this. He doesn't know how to tell her to fight for happy ending after this. But he is the Author now; it's his job to make sense of it.

"Henry, do you need…?" Regina's voice trails off because she he no idea how to help him.

He doesn't answer, just heads up stairs. Regina lets him go. Maybe she is just as much at a loss as he is.

He snatches up the book that has provided answers every time he has been at a loss before and collapses onto his bed.

Part of it is grief. He loves… loved… no, he still loves Killian. There is no past tense on that and he knows with a sad sort of certainty that there never will be. There is never going to come a point where Henry doesn't want to go to Killian for advice, to go out sailing with him, to just know he is there, down at the Jolly Roger or by his mother's side.

But it isn't just grief. He has grieved before. He had grieved when everyone believed Archie was dead. He had grieved when his father died, and again when he remembered everything and could grieve him properly. But by then he had accepted that Neal was not his mother's happy ending. So that had not shaken how the world was supposed to work.

That's just it. Killian is his mother's happy ending, or he was supposed to be. Henry is sure of that. He had come around entirely to the idea of Killian being part of the part of the family. And Henry believes in Happy Endings. He has the heart of the truest believer and that is the one thing he believes in above all else. He just doesn't know how to reconcile that with his mother having to run Killian through with a sword just when Killian was at his most heroic. He can't reconcile that with his mother's anguished cry as she sank to the ground with her dying love. He can't reconcile that with a world without Killian in it.

Regina comes in a while later. Henry has no idea how long it has been, only that he is sure he has run out of tears.

"I brought you some hot chocolate," his mother says hesitantly. He looks up and sees that her eyes are red too. "With cinnamon," she adds softly.

He takes the mug, a tiny spot of warmth on a bitterly cold night. She doesn't ask if he is alright, just sits beside him on the bed, looking over his shoulder at the story of Prince Charles and Princess Leia in the Storybook.

"It's not supposed to be like this," he says quietly.

"I know, Sweetheart, but things don't always end up the way they should."

"It usually does," Henry snaps. He's not angry with her and she gives him an understanding nod. "A low moment is fine," he says hollowly. "But the heroes fight back and everything turns out okay. But the hero _did_ fight back. And now he's gone. That's not how the story is supposed to go."

She pulls him into her arms, just holding him while he cries. It's been a long time since she did that. "Not all stories end the way we want them to," she says softly.

"It's not a story," Henry says, defeat in his tone. He shoves the book aside, letting it fall off the bed, landing half open on the floor.

Regina stands and picks up the book. She closes it and sets it on the dresser before sitting back down beside him.

Robin comes in a little while later. "The baby and Roland are both asleep," he says quietly. He sits down on Henry's other side. He doesn't try to say anything to make everything alright. Like Regina he just sits, looking a little lost himself.

* * *

Henry wakes to the buzzing of a phone. He doesn't remember falling asleep, or Regina and Robin leaving, but he is alone and the sun has risen. He reaches over and is shocked to see that he has a text from Emma.

 **Meet me at the loft.**

Emma gives them the rundown on Gold's betrayal. Henry knows that isn't the end of the story just a second before she says it. He can see the defiance in her eyes. It is hope. Not like Mary Margret's hope, a soft emotion, a belief that the world will bend itself to accommodate her happiness, no, his mother's hope is much closer to anger, a defiant determination that if the world is not to her liking, she will bend it herself until her family is safe and together and happy. And hope flares in Henry too, because when Emma decides to take a leap of faith she has never been wrong.

"So I'm going after him," she says.

"You're going to Hell," Snow White asks incredulously. Seeing all the lengths she and her True Love and gone to in finding each other, Henry feels her surprise is a bit misplaced.

"The Underworld," Emma corrects, although that doesn't sound any better to David. While they discuss, Henry works back over everything that has happened. He should have known better. He _knew_ that ending didn't work. Of course it didn't. It wasn't the end.

Even Regina concedes that it could work and Henry knows with absolute certainty that it will. Maybe not exactly the way they think it will, but it _will_ work because there are few people in this or any world who deserve a happy ending more than his mom and Killian. Henry smiles. _This_ is how things are supposed to be.

"So when do we leave?"

"We?" Emma asks.

"You think you're leaving me behind, don't you?" Henry asks.

"Of course we aren't taking our teenaged son to the Underworld with us," Regina says reasonable.

"Of course you are," Henry counters. "Because, if I'm going to be in the Underworld, you would rather me with you instead of finding my own way. Because I can be pretty resourceful and getting to the Underworld shouldn't be _that_ difficult. I hopped a bus to get you from Boston and I was ten. And you have the exit plan with you. One way or another I'm seeing this through." His voice grows quieter, less defiant, more pleading. "I watched you lose your happy ending three times. I can't miss being there to see you get him back."

Emma opens her mouth to object, then closes it again. She and Regina exchange a look, perhaps trying to make a decision.

"A word," Regina says, beckoning for Emma to follow her away from the group huddled at the counter.

Henry waits a little awkwardly in the kitchen. He sizes up the rest of them and doesn't think any of them are opposed.

"Alright," Emma says when they get back.

"You can come," Regina says.

"Under the condition that you stay behind us," Emma says.

"Under no circumstances are you to interfere in a fight," Regina says.

"And if we find a safe place and tell you to stay there, you will do it."

"Without arguing."

"And you won't get in Gold's way, because he is definitely up to something," Emma adds.

"Ummm, he's being blackmailed," Henry points out.

"He's been blackmailed before and he almost killed… everyone," Emma says.

"Fair enough," Henry says. "I agree to the terms."

* * *

They have most of the day to get ready. His grandparents and Robin both go to see the fairies to make sure the baby's and Roland are properly looked after in their absence. Emma enlists the Dwarves to serve as interim sheriffs. Regina is gathering up some magical supplies she thinks might prove useful and also has Killian interred in a glass coffin like the ones she had used for Snow White and for Daniel. "This might take a while and I doubt he wants to be a zombie pirate when he comes back," she says by way of explanation. Henry smiles at that because Emma isn't the only one assuming that yes, of course they will get him back.

Henry has very few preparations to make but he runs back to his room to grab the book. He also grabs one of the empty books and a pen. This story looks like it will be worth writing.

That night, as the moon rises, they all stand on the shore of the lake where Killian gave his life for all of them. But this time there are no tears, no goodbyes. This time the low moment is over and the heroes are fighting back.


End file.
